From Desert to Drop-in: Sukkot is an opportunity to ensure teens all teens feel welcome
By Rachael Fried
As we celebrate Sukkot, the holiday where we leave the comfort of our homes to dwell in temporary huts, I’m reminded of how deeply its themes resonate for queer youth and young adults. Sukkot is an opportunity to reflect on how we build community, address vulnerability, and make connections in spaces that do not necessarily belong to us.
During this holiday, we spend a week living in a sukkah – a fragile structure exposed to the elements – to remind ourselves of the 40 years the Jewish people spent wandering the desert after leaving Egypt. Much like the teens we work with, these people built communities wherever they journeyed, despite the uncertainty and impermanence of their surroundings.
The sukkah is not permanent, nor is it private. Instead, it’s intentionally communal. A sukkah’s open walls and purposely flimsy roof challenge us to reflect on what it means to build community in a space where we are not fully welcome. For many LGBTQ Jewish youth, the feeling of not belonging – of needing to build a community for themselves precariously – mirrors their own experiences.
Many feel like they don’t quite belong in the spaces in which they were raised. Now, amid the rising anti-LGBTQ rhetoric and legislation combined with the rising antisemitism over the past year, many have found themselves unwelcome in spaces where they previously sought refuge. This compounds the anxiety and isolation that many queer Jewish youth feel in faith-based spaces.
At JQY, home of the first and only LGBTQ Jewish drop-in center in the country, we strive to create a community that provides safety and support in a world that often feels hostile or indifferent to the needs of queer Jewish youth. Our participants, some of whom have actually been displaced from their homes or communities because of their identities, find in JQY a community where they can finally stop wandering and be welcome as their full selves. We teach our youth to feel at home with themselves, even when the world tells them that their experiences or identities do not have a place in Judaism.
But we also know that as an organization that works with teens and young adults, we cannot be the sole place of refuge. Jewish communal institutions can and should do more to welcome in and care for all in the community, including LGBTQ Jewish individuals.
At the heart of Sukkot is radical hospitality – welcoming the stranger, embracing the vulnerable, and creating space for those who might otherwise feel left out. As we sit in our sukkot this year, we should all reflect not only on the fragility of these structures but on their purpose: to create a space for connection, community, and joy, even in the midst of uncertainty.
Sukkot encourages us to embrace the unknown with joy. The Jewish people, wandering through the desert for generations, had to continuously build temporary houses that were never homes, relying on their faith and each other for survival. As the new year gets underway, let’s continue to build spaces – both physical and emotional – where every LGBTQ Jewish youth can feel safe, celebrated, and at home.